The 4 most important persons for a relationship

Yes, right. In the example of Anton and Bella, Anton’s imaginary person of Bella is the nagging, always dissatisfied girlfriend who is never happy with anything. Anton’s imaginary Bella is obviously very different from the real Bella. In reality, Bella may be a very loving and caring person who wants only the best for Anton. But Anton does not see this, because he only perceives the imaginary person he has created in his head – his “imaginary partner”

The same goes for Bella. Her imaginary person Anton is the lazy guy who never does anything and expects you to do everything for him. The real Anton is probably a very hardworking and responsible person who only had a bad day at work. But Bella doesn’t see that, because she only sees the imaginary person she created in her head – her “imaginary partner”.

Not recognizing or not wanting to recognize the difference between such an “imaginary partner” and a real person sooner or later leads to a fundamental misunderstanding of the other person, their intentions and their goals. And this misunderstanding is often the cause of relationship stress, because we are constantly trying to interact with imaginary people instead of a real person.

It always gets complicated when we try to project our hopes and desires onto these imaginary partners and wonder why our real relationship participants then behave differently than we would have liked. The problem is that in such moments we simply communicated with the wrong person. After all, a person who does not exist cannot take out the garbage, while another imaginary person cannot stop nagging as long as we create them exactly the same way and not differently. Pretty logical, isn’t it?